Aaron Housos James waits for

Aaron here.  Some people aren’t honest, I’ve had a moments as obvious as it may have been, so I’m coming out as a matter of principle, most of you know that I am gay, my relationships have been public knowledge, for me it’s all been about the word and the stigma attached to it, because I’ve never been exactly closeted, I’ve had a reputation for being bluntly honest and I would like to keep it that way.  There may be some misunderstanding about this, with me having been so open with things regarding sexuality, it’s all been about the word, and how that word could some how make me less of a person to be taken seriously, which is something that isn’t really true.  This would be a totally different matter if I had been duplicitous in some way, trying to lead separate and compartmentalized lives like the majority of people do, and we aren’t just talking about closeted people, which I’ve never been, though closeted people can be the most duplicitous types of people and perilous to know because everything will always be one sided and they will toss anyone at the drop of a hat causing a lot of damage, not to say I haven’t caused irreparable damage to the relationship that mattered most to me, but I hold myself accountable for that, others hold me accountable for that, the regret is very real.  What I want to address here is the people who will not allow themselves to be accountable for their duplicitous actions, people who set themselves up in other’s lives gaining their confidence, they are so friendly in the beginning, gaining your trust when it is all just a game of leading you on while they speak behind your back and try to poison other people against, just to turn on you, and never be held accountable, in fact we’ve seen that today.  This is a little more extreme than a closeted person and indicative of a mental imbalance, which is no excuse.  You have to think of the lengths they went to so that they could gain this trust, how far they were willing to take their lie that was all part of some game they were playing, then they claim to be the victim when they instigated this entire scenario.  That perilous situation leaves you to wonder where you stand with the other people involved in that game, do you know who you can trust or believe anymore?, it will be a nagging question in the back of your mind, because you know you will have been maligned, in this situation I know this to be true, although I would have been maligned to a lesser degree but one of my bandmates was.  What will the fall out from that look like, we’re obviously dealing with a very manipulative type of person, someone who has accused me of being a dramatic high schooler, when no one else I’ve ever known has accused me of being dramatic, but I’ve never had much invested in social media to where I would have the nerve to block someone especially after I had gotten access to phone numbers and personal information under the guise of playing some game, who’s the dramatic high schooler now? I would be expected to make an explanation. Unfortunately honesty is in very short supply and people will play people against other people leaving a lot of hurt and damage that they refuse to pick up afterward, and people have been pitted against each other here through a third party, again leaving the question, who can you believe?  Who can you trust?  What was the truth?  Why was this allowed to go on?  Why was this lie necessary? And was only one person in on this lie? If I knew about it, I doubt it.

Part of this is why it’s necessary that I come out, so that I am in no way confused with such deceptive actions.  Others who can’t but won’t come out are part of this perilously deceptive disgrace, just as much as an individual who would go to lengths to gain your trust and toss you.  Ironically I was never in the closet, the public knows, it was just about a word.  What’s your excuse?  And what page are we on here or does everything just fall apart because people won’t explain themselves and be accountable?  .

How do you sleep at night?

Our song Exile seems to make more sense to me now, especially since SZ has had his section of the site closed for the time being, except for Op Exile, I can’t say that I blame him. It is available HERE

Meanwhile.  You are all so guilty  Unforgiven (Radio edit)

About Aaron Housos James

A founding member of FilmsCrewBand, Aaron is a multi-instrumentalist and mental health advocate and political activist, with an excellent work ethic.
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