Aaron here. We haven’t forgotten about you, throughout the controversies over the last year involving other people, the Alt-Right hauntings, alien spottings. Gays for Trump (oxymoron), school schedules, Levi in his own world, My ever changing hair colors, Shawn’s now dark and light blonde hair with more 8 string guitars than he can escape, that very pretty boy is a very hard and very conscientious worker and friend. The carnage wrought by the events surrounding last recording, caused us to retreat into our new forum, if you’re a member, you already know, it’s like our version of Only Fans.The last recording did work out well for us, there’s more of it, we’ll be doing some roll out of some very limited runs.Interestingly none of you bright listeners have figured out the title of the album, but some have come close, whoever figures that out, I’ll let you have a night with SZ, or the both of us.We are in pre-production for something a little different, there is a series of recordings from a few years back, tat were entirely experimental in nature, which we are going to recreate, likely as a release, as usual, it will be Films Crew under a nom de plume, keep your ears open Post Marxists. I know I’m not supposed to post any picture because, Chris?, or say his name, or something, is he silencing my free speech? I’m no Daniel. But I can’t resist here, its too cute.
Aaron here. Let’s discuss some things like redemption, forgiveness, and trepidation. It was with great trepidation when I approached SZ after I had lied and broken him. The anxiety over being turned away without him understanding why I did what I did was almost too much for me, I wasn’t expecting forgiveness but he gave that to me, one thing I learned from that other than he was one of kind, was that I needed to be able to forgive too, although I’ll never become the altruist SZ became, I learned acceptance, I also learned that people have their reasons for questionable actions, they have to be reasoned with, understood, given forgiveness and redemption. Without SZ here, I’m at a loss. Name Redacted hasn’t spoken to me, I did nothing wrong, I have the creeping feeling he’s not speaking to SZ, who wouldn’t have done anything wrong, I have the feeling I was left out of the loop on something, the last thing Name Redacted said to me is that he loved SZ, the last time I saw SZ, he barely spoke. Those two have a connection that could transcend anything, Those connections aren’t found in most peoples’ lives, I hope they understand that.
We have another release in the works, the project is my namesake PSYM OPSIS 0 (pronounced Psy’ Mope Sys), however it is a blend of Films Crew and the Peyrony Project. We have attempted this before, but SZ and I got the balance right, with the majority of it tracked on tour last year, with the finishing touches to be complete soon. Symopsis 0 might be a one-off project, I have no release date for it, thought it will be first available on vinyl in a limited edition run. SZ and I wrote it, SZ produced it, and the rest of the band plays on it, it is called Redemption. Redemption is taking a bit of a back seat to the new Films Crew, because it is a side project. Something from Redemption will be up to stream shortly.
We have more questions from email, most of which can be answered by reading my last four updates. There are a lot of questions about SZ that I can’t answer. And a lot of warnings about New Borat, who none of us know, so none of us would know anything about it, we aren’t looking to find him, we aren’t involved enough on social media to care. As I said Name Redacted wanted me to make sure SZ was as far away from New Borat as possible because Christopher has a personal interest in SZ, who is nowhere, and this is Name Redacted site as well. As I also said, we’ll have to ride this out. Re-read my last four updates and everything will be clear.
I also wanted show my appreciation and gratefulness to Conny, Andrew, Christopher, Amanda, Ann, SZ, Stephen. and Brett
Crying To Crisis Preview
A Films Crew Track SZ wrote for Name Redacted (SZ I miss you most of all)
Step by step it’s moving on… Can’t get a place… Hold on… Sleep in me… Wake up in you…
Born in you… Inside your eyes… The path is clear so don’t be afraid… Sleep in me… Wake in up you
Stay clear… Stay and feel… I see you… I see you… Same feeling… I’m nearby… I’m nearby you…
Christopher can login here, and change anything I say, or erase it all, or HERE (which Jay re-designed for him).
If you have something particular to ask hit our contact page HERE or email us at actionsactive [at] shawnzone.org
Aaron here. Where do I put this? This isn’t good content for the front page. I don’t have SZ at easy reach for his forensic sense into psychology and politics, it’s something I often need. I think Christopher would agree with me on that, since I’ve noticed a lot of his source material comes from SZ as well. We’re a very politically focused band as individuals, our output is very psychologically focused. And there are issues. I go through a lot of email we get, especially due to my last update, and maybe some of those questions need to be answered, if they can be answered, and if they can’t be then that’s an issue we need to loo k at. We usually aren’t in the habit of discussing personalities, anybody else’s or ours’, (unless it’s political, but sometimes people around us become their own political system), and these are some of the issues we need to focus on since my last update, and all of the email response to it.
Let’s get to New Borat first. I don’t know him, no one in Films Crew has anything to do with him. As I said last week, it was Christopher that brought something disturbing to my attention, and also Christopher that wanted me to make sure that SZ didn’t come into contact with SZ. New Borat seems to want some sort of relationship with SZ, Christopher didn’t want that to happen because of his own self-interest with SZ. and I’m supportive of that. New Borat’s popping up all of a sudden, was a surprise to us. We had no idea that he was some sort of viral internet sensation, or that he had this interest in us for a few years. We had no idea that he had up to four websites at one time, that he has some sort of band, we knew none of it. How would we? We understand that people like this can be dangerous, and we are uncomfortable with the amount of details he seems to know about us. So when you email us about his, we have no idea what you are talking about. As I said, we will have to ride this out.
Now let’s get to my observing of the Alt-Right. I paid attention the drama that was Gamer-Gate, because it was ridiculous. SZ had the analytic capabilities to realize that the fall out from Gamer-Gate was going to be a pseudo political wave, where a few Alt-Right pundits were rising quickly, but he didn’t see them as having a prominent figure that they could attach themselves to, enter Trump. SZ was able to map out the hierarchy of the structure that became the Alt-Right. Motivational cult leader Stefan Molynuex and white nationalist Richard Spencer came out of Gamer-Gate with ‘Men’s Rights Activism’ with the anti-gay non-homosexual Milo Yiannopolous, all propping up cocaine super model Mike Cernovich, (who thinks he is a journalist). This movement would have shriveled up as an online movement, if it had not been for Trump, who has neoliberal neoconservative ideology, while the Alt-Right lives in some anarcho-capitalist libertarian fantasy. Where these two meet is; white supremacy, patriarchy, misogyny, and being anti-gay. So the Alt-Right attaches themselves to Trump so they can push their agenda. My interest piqued with the lower level of the pyramid, the malcontents that appeared on social media who became instant political pundits, particularly on the Periscope app, they have been attempting to clone the behavior and views of the Alt-Right so-called spokespeople in a stupefying display of ignorance. When it comes to my activity on the Periscope app, I’ve just been observing dregs of humanity, in terms of the Alt-Right, this is small group of people who actually believe they are reporting the news on an app, so there was originally a comic relief to it, however like the rest of Periscope they are mentally unstable, and the cognitive dissonance is mind numbing. I don’t know which mental disorders they aren’t being treated for, but they are all in some since delusional. They ramble on senselessly, mostly on drugs and or in an alcoholic stupor, (one of them is on some heavy psychiatric meds) without any knowledge of politics or policy at all, spewing racism, xenophobia, homophobia, and classism, when they, themselves don’t appear to be employed or getting an education. They, like anybody else on that app do this for the instant gratification of attention because they are narcissists. What they don’t realize is they display the behavior of people who have been indoctrinated into cults, for the most part the Alt-Right is a loosely affiliated cult that has absolutely no idea what they are talking about.
Now let’s get to SZ. He is still with Films Crew, I’m not sure what is happening with him, I’m not sure where he is. There were some unresolved issues in his personal life, which we hope get resolved, these issues aren’t up to him to resolve, as the best I can understand it, he is at the behest of someone else. That someone else I happen to like. I don’t seem to know the details of the situation, which make it more difficult for me to understand, I touched on this last week. This is not a situation where SZ could have any way done anything wrong, it’s just not who he is. The last I knew of the situation is that both SZ and this individual had both told me they loved each other, so I don’t know what is going on here. This individual told me that he considered SZ to a “gift” in his life, and he had reassured us that his intentions were completely forthright. Anyone would be incredibly fortunate to have SZ in their life, believe me, I know. Again what pains me is how SZ has referred to himself as a novelty, and unfortunately there is so much truth to that. And what I mean by that is because of SZ’s nature, he has is often the target of people who just want his attention, or use him for their own instant gratification, or a momentary trophy. All of this leads to some really lopsided relationships, not through his own fault. I wouldn’t think that is what has happened here because of the reassurances I have gotten from the other individual involved, I wouldn’t want to even consider that type of behavior from him. That individual, as I said last week can login in here and add to this or erase it, he can also login HERE.
Now let’s get to the issues of guitars. If it looks like a Gibson, that doesn’t mean it’s a Gibson, because SZ flat out refuses to use Gibson products. The Firebirds SZ uses, are by Dillon with Parker necks, and The Electrical Guitar Company, and they are baritone guitars, the same goes for a Les Paul he uses, which is the same configuration as the Dillon Firebirds. So there’s a lot of carbon-graphite, stainless steel, and aluminum. During the recording we’ve been using a lot of different things, SZ was using Dillon SG baritones, (same configuration as his other Dillons), Parker Flys, baritone and seven string guitars. And as usual custom Telecasters. We’re experimenting a lot with the new recordings, so we tried new approaches for a wider sonic range.
Now let’s get to the issue of what’s coming up about the new release. and what I did not say. I did not give out a title for the album, and I did not say we were releasing 17 tracks. I said we were releasing nine tracks, but do to running times and and the limitations of how much of that can be put on vinyl for the best possible fidelity, add that to running time of our songs, we are hoping for nine tracks. This is a limited edition vinyl only release. I don’t know the quantities that will be available or how many runs there will be, but each run will be different. We aren’t involved with the business aspect of this release, we just put it together, our corporate overlords handle the rest of it. I don’t know when Warner will send out availability notices, it won’t be some social media event.
Now let’s address the issue of social media. Last week I said some disparaging things about social media, and I’ve heard back from many of you. Thank all of you for seeing my points. None of us do much with social media because of how toxic it is. The level of narcissism and dangerous group think is ridiculous. Social media literally tears relationships apart and disconnects us more than it connects us. I may spend some time on Twitter which I keep really restrained. I may spend some time observing the Alt-Right on the Periscope app, and that app is really toxic, I’ve never seen more manipulation and drama anywhere else, it breaks the concept of social media down to it’s raw nature, which is tearing other people apart in order justify ‘your’ existence. As I’ve said that app is the home of the mentally unstable who refuse to get help. And again, people need to stop blaming their behavior on their mental disorders, because their behavior is a choice.
This all refers to issues I talked about HERE and HERE
This is a preview, Syndrome
Another Christopher inspired track to which SZ wrote it for
I swim… motions from prospect realities… I dream… Silk touch… Silence…
Flying over the essence… I’m alive..
All we’ve got is this moment
Dark… Away… Are we lying to ourselves with illusions? Clear mind, feel now, smiling…
There is no time… Crying… I’m alive
All we’ve got is this moment
The finish… Diving… The limits of… Ice… Embrace in front of us.
Inside crumble… Dead or so…
All we’ve got is this moment
Aaron here. Below is the text from the update I just posted.
…Although here I am addressing some topics that didn’t need to be on the front page. First we’re going to deal with the New Borat issue. We aren’t sure of his name, we aren’t sure of his origin. So we asked a professional, namely a security consultant. New Borat at first seemed to be some form of attack from two anti-gay Trump supporters, on both SZ and Christopher, originating from the Periscope app, from which these anti-gay Trump supporters broadcast to a small racist, xenophobic, and homophobic audience when they aren’t being trolled. I’m not mentioning their names either, due to the fact they have had a history with an attack on this site last November. We had received emails alleging to be from these two anti-gay Trump supporters, however they couldn’t be verified because their domain, (website) went offline around the same time we received the first email. When Jay, (our webmaster) looked up the records for that domain (website), their site had been taken offline by a third party, obviously by the person paying for it. The first email did come from that domain, and contained no mention of any New Borat, the content was about an editorial SZ had written in his Top 10 for 2016 music list, and a demand that we create some content about some very sketchy internet radio streaming service owners who had cancelled them for anti-gay hate speech. We published this. The following emails were different in tone, demanding the same thing, with the addition of trying to pawn off on us someone referred to as New Borat. By this logic, it was a blatant attempt to that seemed like an advertising campaign to replace Name Redacted with this New Borat. Due to the relationship between SZ and Name Redacted, it was quickly deduced that this was someone who was trying to interfere with that relationship, meaning that New Borat was paying attention to all of this as it was going on, and he had help. The following emails came from a Gmail address, also containing a phone number that originated in probably the Colorado Springs area instead of Denver, where it should have originated from. So Jay (our webmaster) was doubtful the following emails originated from the anti-gay Trump supporters, and at the time we said that we doubted their authenticity. It was obvious that New Borat was following all of the information on our site, other sites, as well as much of the activity on the Periscope app. New Borat seemed to be pursuing a relationship with SZ, however SZ and Name Redacted had developed a relationship, with Christopher asking me to put some distance between New Borat ever coming into contact with SZ. Here, Name Redacted’s instincts were on point, the security consultant we contacted, said that New Borat’s preoccupation with SZ had gone on for a few years at the least. He found very little to tie New Borat to the anti-gay Trump supporters, New Borat may have have used the anti-gay Trump supporters as a means to get where he wanted to be, close to SZ. To be clear, we have no involvement with this New Borat, we are very uncomfortable with his his knowledge of us and with the terminology in which he refers to us, us includes Name Redacted. From what we understand from the security consultant we contacted, New Borat has probably used social media to coerce information out of others. While we don’t believe he is as disturbed as he would like to portray himself in his writings, we have been advised that he is determined. Also since it was also pointed out us that he is is viral in, an internet since, with quite a track record for being a spectacle, we will just have to ride this out. For the sake of transparency, the security consultant we contacted is a longtime friend of SZ’s brother, who did a background check on me before SZ’s family took me into their home, his name is Justin. Further transparency, Jay, our webmaster, is my partner.
This has caused us to review some of our practices. We aren’t exactly active on social media, we’ve mostly thought it is narcissistic, we have never used it to promote the bands or projects we are involved with. We do have a Slack Channel for Films Crew, which we have restricted following an incident by someone acting on behalf of a Periscoper who I refer to as That French Bastard, in which nudes of me were published on Alt-Right forums. To which I say, I want control over my content, if you want me nude, you usually don’t have to ask, I’ll put that content here. It seems most of the strange problems we encounter arise from from the Periscope app whether we’ve used it or not. I’ve had an interest in following Alt-Right political propagandists on Periscope, however, these aren’t mentally stable people, and it seems inhumane to watch them for comedy’s sake, because they have obvious mental issues. They don’t appear to have jobs, pushing pseudo philosophies on white supremacy and drama, constantly infighting with each other. There was one Periscoper I was curious about, who wound up being so damaged, mentally frail and wrapped up in conspiracy theories, that I only occasionally check in on him to see if he is coping any better, and he’s not. There are very very few people on Periscope that don’t have mental issues. Anyone who picks up that app and starts rambling on incoherently, is doing so for one reason, the narcissistic instant gratification of attention. SZ and I were both blocked by a woman, who went to great lengths to worm her way into SZ’s life yet during her Periscopes she took it upon herself to say some really derogatory and untrue things about him, SZ never uttered a negative word about anyone. I, on the other hand will be blunt when it calls for it, though I barely said a word to her, even after she accused me of being involved in high school dramatics, an irony which falls flat on it’s face. I don’t know how her behavior can be justified, although I draw parallels to her and the Alt-Right propagandists in terms of her mental stability. People have to stop using their mental disorders as excuses for their behavior, they may have a mental disorder, but their behavior is a choice. It’s not behavior that can be justified, but those who find a way to justify it are just further enabling it.
Band issues as they are, have been resolved. SZ, I can’t say, his issues aren’t with the band. He has naturally had trust issues with me since our break up, these issues are well founded, and the breach of his trust is something I live with everyday. He made me want to improve myself as a person, and it’s something I strive towards each day. People don’t change unless they have a life altering experience that calls for it, what I put SZ through, and how I witnessed it, what I lost with him was a life altering experience. It’s easy for some of you to sit in judgement of me over it, assuming I’m constantly in a state of confusion about to cause a catastrophic state of affairs, it’s simply not the case, and to those few please realize, you aren’t living it, you haven’t learned from it. I was truly blessed to have SZ and his family as my family, to think that I have not learned a great deal from my mistakes would be ludicrous. I can’t speak for SZ, because he’s not mine any longer, as much as that pains me. It’s disturbing that Nathan will still turn up on this site and they to take matters into his own hands, when he set out to tear us and the band apart at the beginning, assuming he has some power over us is simply ridiculous. SZ was the most rewarding relationship I could have ever asked for in my life. I can only trust that the person who SZ would allow to speak for him has resolved things with SZ as he indicated to me that he would. SZ often referred to himself as a novelty, unfortunately more times than not it tended to be true, I have been really disturbed by the way people have wondered into his life, used him for they needed, then turned their backs, professed loyalties and love only when it was convenient for them, expecting him to always be there for them, being who he is, he always has been.
There are some people I want to thank for their reassurance and friendship which I value greatly, Name Redacted, Amanda, Ann, Joey, and the band. Shawn if you’re out there I miss you the most. (not because you wouldn’t give me the info from SF), You’re absence is unbearable
This is a preview, Crying To Crisis 2nd Version
SZ wrote this for Name Redacted
ORIGINAL COINCIDENTAL ISSUES UPDATE TEXT
From the front page HERE
I’ll keep updating this update, throughout the week. I’m going to review some of the finer points of the take aways from the last fews weeks, updating any new information, and I’ll be answering a few of your questions. What seems to be on your minds out there, is how are we doing without SZ? Some of us aren’t without him, all of you, however are. He has taken himself offline for the time being, it was a personal situation that I have explained below, (please re-read). We are hoping the situation gets resolved, but to my knowledge, the individual who caused the dilemma, is passively-aggressively leaving SZ in a limbo of hurt. I can’t explain this properly, because I don’t wish to hurt this individuals feelings. I understand all of you want answers about this, we don’t know how some of you are aware of this, and that the individual can log in to this site and explain himself. SZ won’t see it because he is taking time away from the site, so he will have to deal with SZ on his own. We wouldn’t normally think this was an elaborate game that was played out over several months, I don’t think that is the case, but the individual in question needs to fix the damage that’s been done, he is the reason SZ withdrew himself from the site, is taking a break from the band, and is offline. Short answer, a guy said he loved SZ over a period of several months, somehow hurts him, then ghosts him. It sounds cruel, but there is more nuance to it than I’m able to give it. Some of you have asked how we are dealing with this, we are waiting the situation out, we are hoping for the best, this individual asked us to believe in him, reassured us, we have no reason to believe he is a sociopath. I, in fact hold him in highest regards I don’t know where and how some of you know more than we do about all of this, or if what you know is accurate. I’m not upset with the individual who caused this, I am trying to understand why. He hasn’t given me the details of any of this, nor did SZ.
He can login here, and change anything I say, or erase it all, or HERE (which Jay re-designed for him).
The other thing I don’t have a clue how some of you know more about than we do is the upcoming limited edition release, we have said very little about it, although we’ve streamed edited versions of the songs here. What do I know that I can tell you, It will be a 180 gram Japanese vinyl pressing, double album, and will contain at least nine of the 17 tracks we recorded, and are still recording, this is all fluid at this point because it is a conceptual work. Everything was written by SZ and myself, and it will contain a couple of surprise items. It had a working title, although that has changed. We know very little about the release at this point, our corporate overlords do.
We haven’t scheduled any dates for the summer due to a few factors, with no thanks to our new administration, visas for quite a few bands headed out of the States have been extremely difficult to get, (the same for bands coming in). We had intended to take time off after last year’s tour, that time off never materialized between conflicting schedules, family situations, schools, etc. Lastly I am undergoing treatments for complications during something uncovered during a tonsillectomy. This is not to say appearances won’t happen, though we’ve had no time to devote to new visuals. Our focus at the moment is on recording, music seminars and resolving all of the issues and tasks that have arisen around us.
Some of you asked if we read all of your email, well, we can’t if it’s not in English, and sometimes there is too much of it to handle on our schedules, we always appreciate it. Some of you asked me about my coming out, it is what it is, it was about a word and the stigma associated with it, I never lied about it, I was obviously in a very public relationship with SZ for a few years, and yes, he was worth it and is the best, and I ruined it, (see below). It was just about a word, what’s your excuse?, why aren’t you out? Some of you have asked whether SZ is as thoughtful as he appears on stage, in writing, etc., or if it is a character of some kind, actually he’s unimaginably better than what you get on stage, through music, or words, one thing I am sure of is, that I will never meet or connect with someone of his pure love and brilliance again in my life, I’m unbelievably grateful to have had him in my life, anyone would be. We have never presented ourselves to all of you as some sort of characters, we are who we are, we’ve never been interested in being personalities, Films Crew has never been about that, it has always been about the music and an aesthetic, and sending those concepts out into the world to see how we can make a positive impact, it has never been about our gratification, we just don’t have the egos to be in that part of the industry, we try not to involve ourselves in or be the product. We know sometimes that is unavoidable, so we are as transparent as possible. Finally, someone asked if I go back and re-write earlier updates, yes I do, everything I write has some finer points to it, there are often times where I am trying to communicate something to someone in particular in the context of a broader point, and I’ll refine that point. I sometimes struggle with writing, how I stay true to my bluntly unfiltered personality, without falling over myself in making several points, thank all of you for encouraging me. Re-read my last updates below, because they will have changed. I’ll update this too.
Aaron here again. Update to update. Thanks for some, not all of the responses we got. Again, the band has not come to an end over a dispute that Levi and I started, we’ve had them before, all bands have them, this one had bad timing. SZ has not left the band, things are still strained but we are talking via text, he has another situation going on which has deeply affected him, which we are concerned about and probably won’t let go of until things are back on the path they were supposed to be. Thank you for you concerns about my tonsillectomy complications. I needed to re-word somethings in the update below for clarity and accuracy, so please give it a re-read. Yes, I did come out last week, what’s your excuse for not doing so?
It was mentioned to me recently that people do not like confrontation, it’s something that generally keeps people from misbehaving, although I can’t help wonder what happens when people won’t confront themselves or those who’s actions have affected them negatively, do they run from this forever?, do they have no conscience? We sometimes have to take a step to confront the error of our ways, especially with who we have wronged. or what we stand for is nothing but hypocrisy.
Can we all stop using mental problems as excuses for our behavior? Seek help. Peace – Aaron
Aaron here. I’ve never been one for tolerating drama in my life, from myself or from others, despite some woman on Periscope saying I engage in high school dramatics when she is the one doing so. Since I have been blocked as well after having done nothing, it’s obvious this woman wants me and particularly SZ out of someone’s life and she is going to do what she can by any means necessary to make this happen, but she is trying to control a situation without any regard for anyone but herself and her pederasty, meaning she is trying to control the person she is trying to isolate, how does he feel about that? This woman who won’t read this, I wonder if she thinks she can cut people out of other’s lives without consequences, it’s really telling how manipulative she is, and her disregard for the pain that is caused by her actions. And she has intentionally caused pain.
If I’ve wanted attention, I’ve always asked, so there wouldn’t be the passive-aggressive nonsense that just builds up a lot of resentment. I have been on receiving end of other peoples drama, I try to understand it, but it always comes down to someone manipulating somebody else, so I take myself out of the situation. This isn’t to say I haven’t made my own massive mistakes, I own those and live with them, others I’ve witnessed tend to run from their own mistakes and don’t learn anything from them, leaving damage in their wake, and dooming themselves to repeat the same mistakes over and over again with different people, always mystified why certain people want nothing to do with them, it becomes an endless cycle. That’s why I chose the word ‘Allegory’. Everything message I give all of you here is allegorical, all my messages have hidden meanings, since we started this band we have all hidden messages in everything we’ve done. While some have thought I have done some dramatic things, it’s not true, I’ve done self-destructive and blatantly damaging things which cost me too much in the way of the people I’ve loved, mistakenly thinking I’d be able to pull everything back together, it never works like you think it will. If I had put more of myself completely on the line with honesty putting things back together, things would have had the outcome I wanted, so I learned passive-aggressive behavior wasn’t the answer. If I laid my soul bare, I would have never been out of this band for brief period of time. Laying one’s soul bare is not a punishment, it’s a level of honesty we should try to achieve at all times. As humans we aren’t natural liars, we put ourselves in positions where we become liars and that becomes a cycle most won’t break free of unless they lay their soul bare. If you can’t lay your soul bare, ask yourself why, and the reason is something as shallow as insecurity, you have to seriously face your demons or you are at the risk of loosing who you consider love and leaving them damaged in your wake, ask yourself if that’s worth it. The same is true for those who grow complacent in their relationships, is it worth the risk losing that comfort and security?, you won’t find again elsewhere.
What may have seemed like some drama from us last week has been misinterpreted, at least band wise. Levi and I were overly demanding of SZ, all of that has been settled for the most part, some feelings are a little sensitive still. The other matter, I’m not sure, I know that SZ is hurt, and one of the people in particular who hurt him thinks I hate him?, which isn’t the case, I’m questioning what kind of person could get you to compromise your ethics, and you should question that too. We all know that SZ wouldn’t allow you to compromise your ethics. If there is one take away from being in a relationship with SZ, it was that I controlled the outcome of things. Not that he was in any way submissive, he was never controlling, he never put boundaries on me, and I never abused that power until I got caught up in someone else’s head game feeding on an insecurity I had. I single handedly ruined that relationship forever by the way I handled the aftermath. You, my friend should learn from my mistakes, face your demons, lay your soul bare, push yourself out of your restrictive comfort zone and undo the damage before it’s too late. You and I have talked about how rare these connections are and how most people will never experience them. I’m not the only one who had the power to stop that relationship from getting off the ground, all of us were weary, but you were convincing, you said you loved him. In fact if you go back in my updates, in the subtext you’ll find that I knew about all of this months ago, I gave you the benefit of the doubt and I’m still willing to, don’t make a fool out of me. You were the reason I made sure there was a great deal of distance from New Borat, aside from his own half truths of his dubious origin, he was someone who knew what he wanted and set out to get it by any means necessary, don’t make me regret that decision. Allegories don’t really work here, they may stop someone from the Village Voice or bloggers, (and they are out there), and I really don’t like restricting my speech. What I really have to say to you is, if you love him, let him know, don’t let there be any doubt, get outside of your comfort zone about it, intimately, or you lose him, and that will leave enough hurt in its wake to ever have the possibility of getting him back. It’s you who has to put the effort in here, he is an innocent bystander who was hit by a wayward train. You know you have a login to this part of the site as well as your own.
Aaron here. Some people aren’t honest, I’ve had a moments as obvious as it may have been, so I’m coming out as a matter of principle, most of you know that I am gay, my relationships have been public knowledge, for me it’s all been about the word and the stigma attached to it, because I’ve never been exactly closeted, I’ve had a reputation for being bluntly honest and I would like to keep it that way. There may be some misunderstanding about this, with me having been so open with things regarding sexuality, it’s all been about the word, and how that word could some how make me less of a person to be taken seriously, which is something that isn’t really true. This would be a totally different matter if I had been duplicitous in some way, trying to lead separate and compartmentalized lives like the majority of people do, and we aren’t just talking about closeted people, which I’ve never been, though closeted people can be the most duplicitous types of people and perilous to know because everything will always be one sided and they will toss anyone at the drop of a hat causing a lot of damage, not to say I haven’t caused irreparable damage to the relationship that mattered most to me, but I hold myself accountable for that, others hold me accountable for that, the regret is very real. What I want to address here is the people who will not allow themselves to be accountable for their duplicitous actions, people who set themselves up in other’s lives gaining their confidence, they are so friendly in the beginning, gaining your trust when it is all just a game of leading you on while they speak behind your back and try to poison other people against, just to turn on you, and never be held accountable, in fact we’ve seen that today. This is a little more extreme than a closeted person and indicative of a mental imbalance, which is no excuse. You have to think of the lengths they went to so that they could gain this trust, how far they were willing to take their lie that was all part of some game they were playing, then they claim to be the victim when they instigated this entire scenario. That perilous situation leaves you to wonder where you stand with the other people involved in that game, do you know who you can trust or believe anymore?, it will be a nagging question in the back of your mind, because you know you will have been maligned, in this situation I know this to be true, although I would have been maligned to a lesser degree but one of my bandmates was. What will the fall out from that look like, we’re obviously dealing with a very manipulative type of person, someone who has accused me of being a dramatic high schooler, when no one else I’ve ever known has accused me of being dramatic, but I’ve never had much invested in social media to where I would have the nerve to block someone especially after I had gotten access to phone numbers and personal information under the guise of playing some game, who’s the dramatic high schooler now? I would be expected to make an explanation. Unfortunately honesty is in very short supply and people will play people against other people leaving a lot of hurt and damage that they refuse to pick up afterward, and people have been pitted against each other here through a third party, again leaving the question, who can you believe? Who can you trust? What was the truth? Why was this allowed to go on? Why was this lie necessary? And was only one person in on this lie? If I knew about it, I doubt it.
Part of this is why it’s necessary that I come out, so that I am in no way confused with such deceptive actions. Others who can’t but won’t come out are part of this perilously deceptive disgrace, just as much as an individual who would go to lengths to gain your trust and toss you. Ironically I was never in the closet, the public knows, it was just about a word. What’s your excuse? And what page are we on here or does everything just fall apart because people won’t explain themselves and be accountable? .
How do you sleep at night?
Our song Exile seems to make more sense to me now, especially since SZ has had his section of the site closed for the time being, except for Op Exile, I can’t say that I blame him. It is available HERE
Meanwhile. You are all so guilty Unforgiven (Radio edit)
Aaron here. Let’s talk about relationships again and how we sabotage them. I wasn’t planning to do an update but on one hand I was presented with a series of urgent questions I didn’t understand and on the other hand a devastated bandmate. On a third hand I know there is some outside interference in that relationship, (Wait people I’m not it), the outside influence comes in the form of needing to conform to social pressures (i.e. bs insecurities), and a person or two outside of the situation trying to influence it, (no, not me). These are people who like drama, control, and manipulating because they want attention and like destroying things that don’t benefit them. This is part of this scenario I’m not supposed to know about but it was easy to piece together, I’m just not dropping any names, and goes back to SZ’s Op Exile update and every update after it, because he was getting pushed into a corner, never mentioning it to me. Now in the insecure mind, (I have one), we will make the colossal mistake about asking people outside of their relationship for perspective, and they are going to ask the people who will side with those insecurities instead of dealing with them, so they are just getting manipulated and not dealing with their insecurities which is just going to sabotage the whole relationship, causing unnecessary pain to the point of throwing that important relationship away. Not realizing that those insecurities, means that there is something that would have made that relationship much richer if they could be gotten over. I never made the mistake of asking people outside of any of my two significant relationships for advice or perspective, with the exception of asking their family members, those are the people who have the best interests of everyone in mind, in this situation I have been a family member. Acquaintances are something we can take casually, relationships are most definitely not, they are rare and precious and for most people they won’t happen, labeling them is perilous, putting rules and limits on them is perilous because that means we are changing who is in that relationship and that pushes them away, and what we push away we won’t get back. What we try to change in another person is what we are in denial of about ourselves. I’ve been fortunate in this regard, the most important relationship I’ve been in was a challenge to face my demons but I was never pushed to do so, in fact I was in control of everything due to the self-sacrificing nature of my partner which made me want to appease my partner. I was presented with a statement about not being content in a relationship in some kind of context that there is more elsewhere, that my friend is a fantasy and a perilous one, because you already know from previous experience, there is nothing but a hollow, and that hollow led you to the comfort that you now have, which is a fantasy for others, contentment is a failure of diving deeper into that comfort and exploring. It’s perilous not to face your demons, the larger truth is that we are responsible for our own actions, our partners are not. If they are hurt, it is up to us to understand and be willing to sacrifice our insecurities to heal their wounds before it’s too late.
A update to my update. Three things, first, we want to wish Name Redacted a happy birthday, we’re grateful he’s part of the Films Crew family. Second, To two very special people that found each other through a once in a lifetime circumstance, that have found something so special, don’t let doubts get in the way, communicate without restriction, love each other, be as one, what you have is beautiful. Third, To one of those two very special people, most things in your life have been one sided, it doesn’t seem what you’ve found is one sided.
Aaron here. I need to update this for clarity. There are so many frustrations in the ranks of Films Crew, not with each other, just with the state affairs that we can’t control. I’m making some apologies for that. We are obviously living in fear of a new administration, and the other issues are personal, ranging from how poisonous social media is, to some personal concerns about each other, because we care about each other. I may appear to be antagonistic towards Name Redacted, or he may think so, but it’s not true, I’m grateful he’s with us. This is a misunderstanding because of my protective nature with SZ. Name Redacted and SZ share something special, something that could be amazingly productive and emotionally rewarding, I’ve wanted it to be understood by the both of them that these types of relationships won’t happen in most peoples’ lives, they need to make the most of it. Of course I’m envious of it, more importantly I support it. I may have underestimated Name Redacted’s capacity to understand what SZ has been through, I may have underestimated Name Redacted’s empathy, I have a habit of being a little too honest, which may have been misunderstood. I apologize for that, even if that perspective is sometimes needed. In all of the complexity we have to deal with everyday, we all have our insecurities, and if you’re really lucky, you might have someone in your life at the end of the day, that will take your insecurities away wanting you for who you are, not an idea of who you are. I understand why SZ has referred to himself as a novelty, it saddens me regardless of its reality, that even I have been guilty of treating him as that at times. To make things clear, appreciate the people who love you, break through the fear of it. Love each other
Aaron here. Maybe Name Redacted will Intervene on INTERVENTION HERE when he is through with his highly secretive undercover assignment, (he was up to something unsavory) to weigh in on the Alt Right. Why bother to make that sound polite, the Alt Right are no more than Neo Nazis, trying to put a positive spin on that is idiotic, why can’t they come out of the closet and just say they are Neo Nazis? They bitch about a PC culture, but they use the term Alt Right which is PC for Neo Nazi. Maybe Name Redacted has the answers for that irony.
That’s not what I came to discuss today. I came to discuss Alternatively, Not Right, as in common decency, something that’s in short supply and some other updates. I normally do what I say I’m going to do, because if I don’t I’ll be disappointing people showing them disregard and it leaves those people to say Aaron is unreliable, worse is when I’ve said I’d do something and gotten distracted by something sort of shady and I didn’t deliver, praying no one would find out why I was absent, I learned they always find out, you always give youself away, by then you’re in over your head with lies and you’ve lost those people.
Let’s talk about greeting card holidays and other events, we just had one. We, as in the band are all separated right now, but so is everyone else in a pretty abstract sense, your best friends are online, if you’re really lucky you may have contact with them offline. Yesterday I made sure to call the people in the band I’m close to, and sent Levi and SZ gifts, SZ got more of my attention of course, but these kinds of things are important to maintain your relationships. If you don’t put some effort into them, they know that they aren’t important to you. Like SZ’s birthday last month, I’ve never seen such a lackluster display of no affection from people that rely on him daily, it made me apopleptic. Not getting into specifics but he had a really rough year bleeding into this one. Because of SZ’s and my history that got lived out in public there’s only so much I can do without opening some still healing wounds, but there was a lot I could do and did. He did the same for me. This is not some plea for attention from the people who listen to us because we don’t want that, it is more of a plea to treat the people in your lives like there is no tomorrow, because sometimes there is not. As usual I have one or two people in mind when I write an update but it can be applied to all of you. So don’t neglect or take advantage of the people important to you, or they aren’t going to be there, and keep your eyes on that road and not looking at the people you pass by as a shiny step up in the world, they aren’t. Keep your commitments.
Waiting in the studio the other night between sessions, I had texts going on with SZ and an unnamed Periscoper, who was getting me all excited about a political Periscope he was going to do last night, which didn’t happen because of the importance of his laundry, although I know he was up to something shady, this is an example of reliability I was talking about, if I pulled something like that I’d never hear the end of it. The texts with SZ turned into a couple of calls even though he was waiting for another call. There was some discussion of some published emails the site received and the fall out from that which comes in a human form. Those emails have been removed but what came out of them is still going on. SZ just started writing on his part of the site recently, and what he contributes is always insightful, and someone put the pieces together of what he was getting across, (everyone understood it except an unnamed Periscoper). What this means, is there is someone new, in route to a member of Films Crew, who will take strays home. Prime example, me, I was a stray and we can all see where I am. The situation comes down to appealing to someone’s weaknesses, and it was nailed in a perfect storm. The emails were very clever, they were insistent that SZ write something about someone else, but knowing SZ would publish the emails, SZ didn’t have to write anything, their case was stated in their emails, this was some masterful manipulation. And in their strange need for us to “Cancel” Name Redacted, they decided to dump a replacement with SZ who is supposed to be a better Name Redacted, appealing to SZ on an emotional level that I would call exploitation. This puts us in an awkward position. If we do nothing, we are as despicable as the emailers and that has a public face on it now. But a sudden new roommate for SZ seems more perilous to me. Granted there is some room for improvement for Name Redacted and he’s way more appropriate than some grubby handed replacement with dirty fingernails. But when I hear “I think I love him”, I just want to ask him how cold his heart is, tell him to stop putting labels on things. Either you love someone or you don’t, face your demons. You’re going to lose the person that loves you, shut the fuck up and do something. If I said Name Redacted, “I think I want to be your friend, I’m not sure, I don’t know what it means, I’m insecure, I’ve got to put a label on it before I can think about it”, I would never be allowed to live that down, so there’s hypocrisy at work. I don’t like any of this because the appeal that has been made to SZ has gotten his attention. it’s just the kind of thing trolls him in, and it could be dangerous. My points about Name Redacted, are just used as examples, I really do like him, and because I do, here me dude, wake the fuck up.
We’ve been asked about tour dates for the European summer festivals. I can only answer with very little information that has more to do with politics than music. Most of the festivals are being booked now, but you’re not going to see as many American bands touring Europe, some of the bigger names will be there. Europeans are holding American’s responsible for Trump, and this makes for a political climate that affects music, a lot of American bands won’t be welcome until something political changes. Obviously we have nothing but contempt for the administration and consider resistance the only option, but that doesn’t get us booked. The Trump administration is having a negative impact on our jobs, so his being a jobs president is pure hypocrisy. To make matters worse, UKIP and its brother white supremacist organizations in Europe have gotten emboldened since Trumps election and have targeted music festivals. We have been offered a few dates, we don’t know how feasible they will be. So it might be that we won’t tour this year, we really can’t say at this time, and if we have enough dates it will probably be last minute. We did an exhaustive tour last year, just months ago, and were supposed to have time off, but we started recording, we have school schedules, so we’re waiting it out. So what do you have to look forward to? SZ and I spent quite a bit of time improvising which we recorded, all of it was structured, a couple of tracks have been up for all of you, there will be more. Those recordings were also what a series of recordings SZ did are based on, which the label wants to release and SZ does not, a couple of those tracks have been featured on his section of the site, it looks like there will be a limited edition vinyl release maybe this year. Also coming out of those recordings is a new Films Crew track, which we are going to have an edited version of on the site, it will probably be released on vinyl sometime this year. We had planned on taking some time off, but all of you are keeping us busy. There had been talk of a podcast with Name Redacted and SZ, which I hope happens. It needs to happen.
That unnamed Periscoper went on to embarrass himself commenting on another Periscoper’s broadcast by being a fanboy and completely ignoring the other Periscoper’s intent and subtext of his broadcast about how toxic people can be, another fine double standard at work here. Periscope has become toxic regardless of politics, it’s broadcast narcissism by attention whores. There are so few genuine people on Periscope that it’s like watching a train wreck of mental illness, where you can actually see how hypocritical and shallow people can be.
Am I happy about any of this? NO. It’s frustrating to witness blatant hypocrisy around me by the people who point out everyone else’s hypocrisy. It’s frustrating to see how screwed up peoples’ priorities are. It’s frustrating that a stray is arriving, it could change everything.
PSA 1: If you have pets, make sure your neighbors use pet safe pesticides and rodent control
Aaron again. Christopher as a part of us, hopefully a bigger part of SZ if he can face his demons, is now heading up the Intervention part of our website. He’s still the subject of my Apologies update, and probably guilty, but the smart ones always are. Welcome Christopher from Films Crew. Claim SZ already for goodness sakes, make it official.
It needs to be addressed within all that appears to happening that Films Crew nor any of the projects like Peyrony or ANNONXN are not disbanding. I don’t know where these rumors spawned from, we were all taking a break after a long year of work. As far as concerns about Shawn departing, I think he made it perfectly clear it was possible he could take a step back and it was personal in nature. Perhaps if reading comprehension were better his statement wouldn’t be misunderstood. We appreciate all of the email and concerns from Aaron’s update below, and were overwhelmed by it. It is perhaps the first time I’ve entirely agreed with a statement Aaron has made, particularly with his Personal Side Note. Yes ‘You’ are guilty, why not try mend a situation while you have the opportunity, because Aaron and myself will see to it that you have no further opportunities to. Knowingly duplicitous. Denial is the betrayal with the broadest shoulders
Aaron here. I answer some email questions, make some apologies and give some explanations.
Levi, Kurt V, Andrew, Amanda, or Name Redacted are free to add to and edit this if they see fit. Christopher has a login, interesting
I have also discovered an ugly truth, SZ was misled by someone. I hate finding these things out on my own when I’m not supposed to, and him not knowing that I know. I wouldn’t blame him if he walked away for a long time. This has to hurt. I’m just going to remain calm and explode later, so anyone who finds my behavior stranger than usual, I’m looking at you, it’s SZ’s birthday this week, will someone honest step forward for once.
This is a personal side note to whom it may concern and that’s you don’t deny it. You are in a situation and you will find it very difficult to explain because you have lied about it by omission already. And knowing exactly what is going on and at the same time denying it is foolish. You are conflicted but know exactly what you are doing and how deceitful it is but you persist. So many secrets to keep track of and they will be your undoing. You will have to make a choice, you will probably chose wrongly and will lose someone. You think they will forgive you or understand but this won’t be the case. You may have been convinced by someone else that you are better off with this loss, you are being manipulated, in turn you are manipulating someone else. All homophobes do this from the closet. You have entangled yourself in a web of deceit because you can’t be honest with yourself. This all makes you the same as those who you call hypocrites. You won’t be able to explain what you are doing since you present yourself as so honest. You’re really just a liar like the liars you hate. The irony. Come clean. Don’t be the new Nathan. Don’t be the new me.
– I wonder if ‘they’ talk about him – I wonder how easy it is to forget – To deny –
GUILTY. YES. YOU ARE SO GUILTY. CONFLICTED WITH SECRETS. A LIAR. I don’t dislike you, I don’t want you to be these things. If only you could find it in yourself to be real and face your demons, the way you insist others face facts, you wouldn’t need this charade, or this disaster you’re hiding and disguising as adventure, which will break someone else in your life. I wouldn’t want to think you preyed on the vulnerabilities of others. Can you be real? You have opportunities you don’t want to squander. If you could just be real. Look at yourself.
Note: That paragraph is a message which has nothing to do with my life, the fall out will.
I’m going to answer some of the questions and make some things more clear from my update of a few days ago because I got a lot of questions, some of these things are hard to explain because they don’t seem like they fit together but they do and there are some things that are between two people confidentially and that has to be respected because there some people out there that don’t respect that which just means they want to manipulate the private affairs that they shouldn’t have any business in and use their big mouths to do it. Basically if something is told to you it’s always meant to be private. People who need to betray that trust are people that want to control a situation they aren’t a part of for their own ends. There aren’t going to be many people you can trust in your life, those who you can trust keep close because they are the ones that have your best interests in mind, not their own.
Tom or Jon usually field and answer all the questions and explain things for us. But right now I have to do it because I have been part of the problem. The offensive emails and messages we get, sometimes I think I should just publish them. They have less to do with music and more to do with our personal lives. No we don’t have Instagram, we aren’t going to do Instagram, we would immediately be banned from Instagram. Instagram is owned by and follows Facebook’s disastrous terms of service and privacy policies, we don’t support that kind of privacy infringement, we have you people spying on us and don’t need corporations on top of that. We have already talked about this with our record label who agreed with our concerns. Warner Chappell Music Group has final say on what ever content we produce or publish.
If I get lucky enough to talk or meet any kind of artist who does their work under an assumed name even on social media like Periscope, it’s part of my job as an artist to respect that. It’s more than just a professional courtesy, sometimes it’s protecting their safety depending on what their art is. You don’t run to Twitter and put them on blast because you could be putting them at risk. This is something that in recent days happened and as strange as it may seem I didn’t cause it. But I have been harassed about it, and you nosy people that can’t behave on social media are out of your minds if you think I’m going to give up a name. It’s somebody you don’t know personally that has never done anything to you, you just want to gossip about somebody and drag them, that’s just cruel. Even if this artist had done something of value for me, it still wouldn’t matter because you still want to gossip and drag them. Maybe some day somebody puts your secrets on blast on social media and lets see how you handle it. Truth is most of you don’t respect confidentiality so why even pretend to be anyone’s friend when you’re just a big mouth snitch. When you see or hear an artist that doesn’t mean you know them or anything about them or that you ever will. There are times that artists get stalked and threatened like we have been to where I’m going to have some empathy for that situation. Thank you Dale. And thank you Dale for an experience that Jay and I enjoyed that we normally wouldn’t do your exploration with us enriched us as a sort of couple.
TAKE AWAY. SOMEONE TRUSTS YOU, RESPECT THEIR CONFIDENTIALITY
I had called Christopher Patrick Reyher out on Twitter for needing empathy lessons, he has none, he may never have any, But most of you need them but most of you need empathy lessons and also need lessons in something called loyalty. So few of you have loyalty and the next shiny new person that you come across you forget your loyalties to the people that have been loyal to you. Makes my head spin. And because I got so many questions about it, I can explain why I can call out Name Redacted on empathy and how that might be justified, I’ve got some insight there. Name Redacted is someone close to SZ, I’ve been in the room when they’ve talked, it gets deep, and that’s something that doesn’t happen often between two people so it’s fantastic and you don’t have to put a label on it. My loyalty is to SZ, I was hoping Name Redacted’s empathy wouldn’t be eclipsed by any insecurities he has. What I said had no context to it and now it does. And due to some recent events and that Christopher and I have a mutual interest in SZ means I have some amount of loyalty to name redacted even if we don’t talk much, we don’t need to because what’s going on is none of my business. I wanted to bring that to Name Redacted’s attention because I don’t want SZ hurt, he’s strong, he’s brave but he’s been through so much. Name Redacted is lucky to have that love, I wanted to make sure he knows that I wanted to make sure that he’s gotta love back. Why is this important to me? Because I have breached SZ’s trust in the past, I have hurt him in ways I shouldn’t have and knew better and I didn’t want to see somebody else do it, but he’ll find a way. This got blown out of proportion, it was my fault I apologize.
TAKE AWAY. DON’T HURT HIM EVEN THOUGH THERE’S A GOOD CHANCE YOU WILL Paying attention? Listen carefully and to this song
Films Crew: Unforgiven (EU Radio edit)
I also need to apologize for my anger over some of the stupid questions about SZ’s possible taking time off and probably saying more than I should about his personal business which he himself explained HERE without being vague. Obviously it’s a personal situation between him and somebody else, what he did tell me is that the other person involved doesn’t even know the situation exists and he did not tell me who the other person was. What he did say was that taking time off would spare the band of being dragged through what ever could come out of the situation. He stated as much when he posted it. IT IS NOT VAGUE. SZ is the most special person I’ve ever known and I’ve done some terrible things in even our relationship as it is now, I’ve taken advantage of his generosity, I’ve behaved in ways that have reflected badly on him, I’ve taken advantage of the idea that he will always be there for me and that has caused us to grow apart in some ways. A lot of people ask why we broke up and if there is any resentment there. We broke up because of my insecurities which caused me to do some really hurtful things because my insecurities seemed bigger than my love for him. I have no problem admitting the reasons because I need to keep facing my own demons to overcome them. Since most of this took place in the public eye, we can review it here quickly. SZ and I fell in love through our friendship after he had some time to mend from that terrorist abuser Nathan. I never considered myself gay and I never considered SZ as gay, because of this I did some typical things people do when they think they need to be in the closet, I’d lie to people about us being lovers when there were pictures out there of us making out. I’d pull back from him sometimes even if I knew he needed me because I was afraid of a label being put on me. I was so insecure with myself that I cheated on him, we all remember this and I’ll tell you why. I didn’t cheat on him with a female, we all remember Kenton, I cheated on him with a male because I was so insecure that just for once I wanted to be the person with the bigger dick and I don’t have a small one and I wanted to do it all in secret. This was outright betrayal of all of the trust SZ had in me, it hurt him, he didn’t understand it because he doesn’t deal with superficial things about people and especially the people he loves. We all know that I have ADD and that can lead to some destructive behavior and it did so I get treatment. Because of my insecurities and ego I took the person I loved the most who I took for granted and destroyed not just him but myself. I took a leave from the band and it was SZ that asked me back. He wasn’t going to give up on all of the things we had built together, we are close even if we are drifting in different directions sometimes. He is a bigger person than I am in more ways than one. We aren’t saying I’m small here, a RNC Trump delegate who plastered my nudes on the web a few days ago doesn’t think so.
TAKE AWAY. DON’T CHEAT, DON’T LIE TO THE ONE’S YOU CARE ABOUT. DO NOT BE PARTY TO CHEATERS OR LIARS, YOU ARE THEN EQUALLY GUILTY IN THE DAMAGE. ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER.
Why I am not apologizing to Periscope’s Gays for Trump team Bobby Leonard and Patrick Skorjanec. I don’t identify as gay because of certain parts of gay culture and I struggle with the idea that I fall in love with men and if I’m lucky get to love one. The thing is I would never outright lie about it like they have. I would never suggest conversion therapy like they have, or tell who might explore that side of themselves to abstain and never would I tell them to stay in the closet like they have. I would not tell them to seek religious counseling saying psychiatry has a gay liberal agenda, like they have. I would not make up lies about gay people vandalizing straight peoples cars because that is just crazy. I would definitely not suggest something as stupid as “Straight Pride”. Bobby Leonard and Patrick Skorjanec as Gays for Trump are an act, as in made up as in not real. They keep repeating there were “Nude gay people dry humping each other on parade floats” at the Denver Pride Parade. A few days ago we all examined footage from the 2016 Denver Pride, THAT NEVER HAPPENED. It was poorly attended with parade floats sponsored by Raytheon and Lockheed-Martin (Defense contractors), several banking institutions, politicians, software manufacturers, airline companies, telecom companies, and a marching band. these are people that wouldn’t tolerate semi-nudity, dry humping or rainbow colored hair. BECAUSE THAT NEVER HAPPENED AT DENVER PRIDE OR THE CONCERT EVENT IN THE PARK. It was all captured on video. This is where my suspicions kick into overdrive because what were Gays for Trump’s Bobby Leonard and Patrick Skorjanec doing at Denver Pride? They were handing out anti-Lgbt literature. We know that you check this site, we know you that both of you are volunteer organizers for the Denver GOP, we know that you have knowledge of the security breach of this website in November. We know that both of you are not boyfriends. We know that your Periscope is coordinated through the Denver GOP. We have a new band member who spent most of the last year in Denver who will testify to it. Bobby and Patrick present themselves as gay, what we want to know is who the two religious women you were with at Denver Pride were. We aren’t saying you are straight because psychologically no one is straight and sexuality is fluid and doesn’t have to be labelled. Even though you are obviously not a couple, do your girlfriends know that you’re sexuality is fluid and they could find Grindr on your Christian phones? Gays for Trump is another internet lie. The best thing about Gays for Trump was Christopher Patrick Reyher calling you slickly produced show and confusing you.
TAKE AWAY. NO ONE IS STRAIGHT PSYCHOLOGY PROVES THIS. SEXUALITY IS FLUID. YOU DON’T NEED TO LABEL YOURSELF BUT BEING IN THE CLOSET IS DECEIT IF YOU DON’T BELIEVE THIS YOU ARE DECEIVING YOURSELF AND YOUR LOVED ONES
What are we doing? That’s a hard question. We are re-recording our first release, which is why you are hearing the radio edits of some of the tracks on the site right now. We weren’t the ones who had approval of the final mixes or mastering, the label was. So songs that were 7 or 8 minutes long were edited down to be radio friendly and they weren’t meant for radio from the beginning. We don’t even have the original raw files, the drives and back up drives were all handed over to the label. Our management filed an injunction on our behalf to our label which they respected and we got to pull our releases because we were able to prove damages to future career for us and the label. We don’t remember how everything went in those original recordings, but there are things we want to change since the label had wanted us to change some of the content. SZ had pushing for us to try expand our abilities and wanted to put some different elements into the Peyrony project so during the tour last summer we did a live recording of that. I don’t know if or when it will be released. We did a big tour and are all different locations now because of school and other commitments, but we are working. Are we doing videos? We might, all of our videos were hit by censors and banned for North America and if we do more I don’t think we would change up how we’d work on that and I’m not the one who does any work on them, so they’d probably stay with the same themes and the puritans will ban them. There is a multi-camera live festival full length show that was shot in August or September and that would be a DVD release and I don’t have details on the status of that.
TAKE AWAY. WE’RE WORKING ON IT ON OUR TIME OFF
I still need to further state that I am not an male escort for the RNC. just because it’s on the internet doesn’t mean it’s true. I’ve been doing a lot drum session work and drum workshops that would leave too little time for escorting and I don’t sleep around. The French man whose name might be Richard who is a troll that could be my dad, with a cult following of Nazis on Periscope that I foolishly let engage me to let me see the light of conservatism because I foolishly thought that I could catch him because he is stalking teenagers, giving location info on other people that use Periscope and digging up things in their personal lives he shouldn’t have any access to, what he is doing is illegal and he is a lawyer or so he says. I fucked up, but it’s not because of me he has this information and now he has information on my family. I got bored during on vacation on the holidays and after watching the French man’s Periscope antics, his bashing of Name Redacted to get to SZ who he bashed harder. I wanted to see what was inside of this group of idiots on Periscope that call themselves the alt right, but they’re really Republican Nazis. I watched them, I chatted with them and they are the most uneducated people I’ve ever come across. And I did this all on that app Periscope. I’m not really involved on Periscope but I started noticing a pattern where these alt right Nazi bigots would troll random Periscopes. I wanted to infiltrate them and I did for the most part but it becomes a circle back to the French man or Richard if that’s his name who plastered my nudes on the internet because I was playing detective. I didn’t endanger anybody else, but it could make the band look bad even though I’ve been nude before. I did get his attention redirected for awhile but he checks this site. I’ll have to keep him entertained, up for it Richard if that’s your name? The one thing I’ll apologize for with the nudes is that I wasn’t trimmed.
And these questions about whether we’re doing Periscope. It’s really not up to us, our label ok’ed our being there, but content is up to their approval. SZ can lose control over the account he’s using, and Warner Music Group can produce content, we’re under contract. This happened with the band Twitter, but a lot of that was my fault. We would probably get banned from Periscope for content. So it’s all up in the air and we want to use real cameras and that involves something else from Periscope. SZ originally wanted to burn a Gays for Trump flag and our management and the label shot that down immediately. These are people that don’t understand there are a couple of straight bro Republican party operatives being gay characters on a highly produced Periscope, so who’s really burning a gay flag here? After the alt right Nazis get through with Periscope what’s going to be left of Periscope? There is enough drama on Periscope between Periscope people that you’d think they were all You Tube divas. That’s what could destroy Periscope more than the alt right Nazis.
And these questions about the site hack. I can’t answer a lot of those, things were erased and between 2 webmasters at different times we lost some content. Our mail servers weren’t touched, but our database driven things were. Nathan fired Jay and wanted someone else, so content is with that person and out of date. SZ wanted Jay back when Jay came back Nathan fired him again and they were over. Then David from Occupy was taking care of it, before Jay came back again. So it is being worked on. SZ has never posted updates or articles to this part of the site, he has his own section and I like that. That had been a process of SZ giving updates to Jon or someone and it would get up that way. I would do a lot of updates but I didn’t have back ups of them. So did Levi, Kurt, and Nik. Most of the music we have back ups of and will be back up. Levi would know more about the videos I think. And Levi or anyone else can add to this update. A lot of this would be easier if Nathan hadn’t started firing people or pursuing a relationship with someone 11 years younger. Let’s review who Nathan fired, he fired me, Chris came in. He fired Levi, Nik came in. He fired Chris, Kurt came in. Logan came in from a project Levi started but had been friends and played with us before. This should be in our Wiki that none of us have access to.
More updates to come A+
Cameron, What ever SZ was trying to get across is probably in this older version this Films Crew song Exile See HERE
This was sudden but not unexpected in light of some of the recent unreasonable expectations and more unreasonable actions placed upon Shawn. It seems he is in the process of making the decision to depart Films Crew and any public life for an unknown length of time. These circumstances were not placed on him by the band or the business, it’s a personal situation that makes me furious. it is unconscionable that some people can treat others like trinkets, leaving them dangling until it suits them, playing amateur psychoanalysts, knowing what a vulnerable time it was for him, that’s abuse. It wasn’t a single incident but a single person who was misleading him. We are hoping he rethinks this decision, because we actually love him.
It appears the powers the be in a post stolen election world saw fit to breach our space corrupting quite a bit of data. The IP of the intruder was 188.8.131.52. In the mean time while we clear the debris the links of importance on this website are as follows
Is @shawnzone’s personal space on the site since he doesn’t contribute elsewhere on the site.
His only response: “My name is Shawn. What’s yours'”
The world you thought you grew up in does not exist. It never did. The illusion is failing a bit more everyday. Some will fight to the death to defend the lies because they cannot accept that their entire foundation was built on a lie. Others try to drown what they suspect deep down with endless distractions trying to ignore the symptoms all around them.when you break down complex systems to simplified blocks of commodities, when you regard the world around you as resources to be consumed you lose the plot. These are the ideals of weak men, weak men are dangerous never to be trusted. Weak men will consume the strong in a suspension of disbelief of illusion. These weak men are predators. The plot thickens.
Peyrony (Films Crew Band Collective) have at the last moment decided to change the name of their upcoming release. As well have made a joint Films Crew Peyrony recording available featuring the entirety of Films Crew Collective. They uploaded an edited version clocking in at almost 22 minutes. It is called He Said It Was Nothing, It will not be up for long and can be downloaded HERE.
It is dedicated to Shawn as many are weak who have not put that effort forth.
Anonymous Communique PEYRONY
Communique by and for Anonymous: Peyrony + Films Crew + Site Updates
M1GS #OccupyWallStreetNYC May 1st General Strike Support
To Anonymous’ surprise, this site surpassed a million visitors last month. More surprising, searches for ‘Nude Pictures of Ginny Nevitt’ Anonymous will work with due diligence to fulfill this request. Pearl Enthusiast Kurt Vogl of Peyrony and Films Crew has been at work creating Ginny Nevitt’s first limited edition CD release backed by the music of Peyrony, Levi’s Predator Band, + Abandoned Halos. More HERE
New from Peyrony Band (Films Crew Collective) Recordings during #Occupations
Upcoming: Bending Around The Break CD (Limited vinyl + cassette), (Some say cassette tape is the new vinyl -> points to ‘Pearl Enthusiast’ Kurt Vogl’s notes from Germany.
Song will be back up after some of the traffic dies down, Skip, Chris, Kurt, Levi, Logan, and the rest of Peyrony will be overwhelmed when they hear of their audience’s response. A download page will be up for you ASAP. We send loves to Amanda. Anonymous
Peyrony: Lost Our Way:
One Way. Don’t cross us off. Weak. And losses too. We have lost our way. Why wait to end it all. From the sky stepped I. Back from distant ruin. Crashed it now, don’t run. Decide, downside why? Pray that’s on its way now. Crashing down by you. Until they wave the charge, we have gone back home.
An Anonymous Communique
Kurt Vogl Peryony Band
Anonymous + The Members of Films Crew Collective have denounced the new CISPA + the renewed SOPA + ACTA Legislations. These so-called reforms are Censorship. Contact your legislative representatives.
Attach yourself to what you feel to be true. Begin there. Every insurrectional process starts from a truth that we refuse to give up. Be evasive. Be confusing. Be different. Be untracable. Be unfound. Be unpredictable. Be safe. And most of all: Sail Strong!
The Peyrony Project: A Performance In Memorium: NYU 01.19 Bent
In an effort to pay our respects Peyrony Perfoms. Levi, despite odds of his own, coinciding with our own loss. is questionable, but not improbable in the line up. We would like to thank WMG. Kenneth Cole Productions, and The Purple Ribbon + It Gets Better Foundation/Campaign for their efforts and support throughout the year, as well as lobbying Peyrony for what we consider an honor to do. Tickets if they are left, available through NYU. All Proceeds, Everything is being donated to The Purple Ribbon + It Gets Better Foundation/Campaign, in our effort to try to make sure No Gay Person has to go through the Bullying, Abuse, and Sociopathic Treatment by Another, even in a gay marriage. The Collective of Films Crew + Productions + Extreme Music are committed to finish the work our Fallen Artist started. There is much work ahead. We’d like to thank Amanda and Tom for their wonderful input and help on the site, and may it continue.
Maybe now we can can come to grips with Peyrony’s performances last year and put them into some context. Sometimes It Doesn’t Get Better when someone’s been in diseased hands, that disease needs to be eradicated, excuses for it are fiction. There’s much work to be done. Anons Hear This. I will try to keep some updates coming this week.
Learn from history. Don’t forget. Find true freedom again. There’s a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious that you can’t take part and you’ve got to put your bodies on the gears. If you want to say something and have people listen then you have to wear a mask. If you want them to be honest then you have to listen to a series of lies. When the dreamer dies, what happens to the dream? STOP making up excuses. STOP saying that you’ll so it tomorrow. STOP believing it will happend by itself. Do it TODAY What will make you “wake up”? We will let you sleep when you let us dream!
Levi + Predator Band Performances with AmenRa : Belgium : France : UK
Predator (Band) Levi D. Wall, Named after the Original Predator Nathan Nevitt + The ANNONXN track. Predator is a Hiatus Experiment of Sonic Assaults fueled by the inexplicable behavior of Nathan Nevitt the rage a Predator must fear and feel when he is found out or caught, the rage of the denial, being trapped by his own cold blooded lies A Sociopathology, a narcissism, an anti-social + borderling behavior disordered mind, the fraud, these things need to be studied Nathan Nevitt is the dissection. Predator Band is an experimint to look inside that mind through art. Studio musicians will be myself and former A.NNON.XN drummer Logan Harris with live and sometimes guest guitarist James Aaron. A musician of SZ’s abilities was desired but this is a thing that can no longer be. SZ is no longer here. This is not Films Crew Band, Peyrony, or ANNONXN, it is the rough experimentation of a project in the formative stages, like all things Predatory it could remain incomplete. -Levi D Wall. Predator Band is my Hiatus Project, named after the ANNONXN track and Nathan Nevitt it will be a study into the mind of the sociopath, I will host the Predator Project here on the website that Nathan Nevitt is the majority owner of. Nathan Nevitt IS this thing (a Predator) until he proves otherwise. An Abuser in denial being enabled in a lie that makes these enablers complicit as criminals. Predator picks up where I left off with A.NNON.XN, after Nathan Nevitt and Nikki Turner dispatched me, (I’m releasing those recordings). As well as the video of Nathan Nevitt’s proposal of marriage and exchanging of vows (by videographer Kyle Moyer of Parks Agency). It is is Nathan Nevitt’s best interests to stop lying about being a Predator and Abuser, until he can prove otherwise. Mr. Daniel Nevitt has warned of impending violoence, come kick my ass instead, fly to New York on your wife’s money and I’ll show you some Love.
I have enjoyed the smell of fear in Texas during my lingering post South by Southwest stay. Austin is relevant to its own self-importance, subpar town with no culture, only a sense of ego inflation with no substance, like Nathan himself -Levi Wall
Anyone who has made the grandiose statement that they have been held down and held back, as Nathan Nevitt has, were actually holding down and holding back someone else in a Predatory way, this thing is what it is Nathan Nevitt’s lie, a thing now bigger than Nathan Nevitt who is no model but a sales associate, I am represented by Ford who I also do photography for. Nathan Nevitt is the thing I will entertainment out of, no one is forgetting as easily as Nathaniel Taylor Nevitt, Predators have no remorse, they are criminals who victimize, as are their enablers who support such behavior. I hear every every lie Nathaniel tells. -Levi Wall